-Catherine Collautt, PhD (via @nutritionschool ) ☀️👏
If it's hard for you to give yourself a break, remember that often the repercussions of your choice go beyond your own wellbeing. We are all connected. When your friend, daughter, sister, mother, father, brother, employee, student, etc. sees you taking care of yourself, they are more likely to feel they have the freedom to be kinder to themselves too. If you're stressed, anxious, tense, etc., and need to step away and take a deep breath, but keep telling yourself, "Oh, just one more email..." or "I can ignore this nagging feeling", ask yourself, what would you tell someone you love? Many of us hold ourselves to higher standards than we hold others--sure, that can bring excellence in some ways, but it is worth pausing once in a while to ask if we are being fair or kind enough to ourselves. One of the keys to making hard changes is knowing yourself.
Here are a couple of resources that have helped me get real about the hard changes I've needed to make to become happier and healthier: Gretchen Rubin's 4 Tendencies Quiz: Gretchen Rubin, of The Happiness Project, has a concept called "the four tendencies". You can take the quiz to see which you are and what strategies will work best for you when you're challenged depending on your results. For example, I'm a "Questioner". I will drag my feet when I have to do something if I'm not convinced it's necessary. Whenever I fall out of the habit of meditating, I remind myself of the many reasons why it's important for me in particular to stay motivated when I want to skip it. However, an "Upholder" type might put it on his or her schedule to make sure it gets done, since having it on the calendar creates the expectation that it needs to happen. Are you a Rebel, Questioner, Upholder, or Obliger? Check out the quiz! Asking Why -- As Many Times As It Takes: Something I also started doing is asking myself why. When I'm nervous, intimidated, or scared to do something or am convinced that I can't do it, I ask myself why it has to be so scary or unattainable. And I don't stop until I have no more excuses left. Here's an example: "I can't teach a fitness class." Why? "Because that's never occurred to me before. It's just not an option for me." Why haven't you ever considered it? "Because I'd get too anxious being at the front of the room telling people what to do in a loud voice. That's too scary to even consider." Why can't you be anxious? "Because anxiety is the worst!! I hate feeling anxious! I can't handle it!" Why can't you handle it? "It would be the end of the world!!! OK, maybe it wouldn't be... I've been anxious before and even if it's been scary, I've survived--maybe I can do this, even if it means I'll feel anxious, I'll get through it." In the end, you may find that your fear is driving your excuses. Are the excuses valid? Question them and you might surprise yourself! |